From my Rock 1053 Bloggings.......

2 Days afta the Super Bowl......

Hey, Charger fans, I get it, your team has not been to the Superbowl in a while but please stop telling me to not feel wicked emotionally unstable. I am wicked thankful that my team has won Three Championships but that does not take away the pain from loosing this one. And I have compassion for you fans, I do........ But I also live and die with my team, so this one, I am feeling like I died inside.....  And I will say this, a lot of you have been supportive and cool, but the ones who keep telling me not to feel bad because "at least you're not a Chargers fan", well, piss off..... I am a Pats fan and my heart is broken right now, let me feel like a wicked emotional wreck.... If you dont want to hear me being broken hearted, then dont read my stuff. I invest so much into my teams AND I KNOW ITS NOT HEALTHY, BUT sometimes I feel like they are part of my family and I live for them. I don't want you to think I am pissed at any of you, I am jsut wicked passionate and am hurting wicked bad right now.... I just dont like being told that it aint that bad, when in reality IT IS. We got beat by the MOTHAF*CKIN GIANTS AGAIN!!!!! I AM HEART BROKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO LAY OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I had to get that off my chest, that just because my city has won championships, that doesn't mean I am not an emotional disasterpiece right now.....

What I have been doing, is trying to find some kind of solace to help cheer myself up..... What I found myself actually feeling a little better about is when I listened to Party Rock by LMFAO this morning and imagined myself, God and Jesus all doing the Party Rock dance together, that actually made me crack a smile. So any New Englanders out there, try that to help get over this hump of a emotional disaster.

I know I invest too much into my teams sometimes, I know I do, and I know a lot of other New Englanders do too.... We have this unhealthy obsession. It feels like life is alright and live-able when our teams are doing well but when they loose, what is the point of doing anything..... I mean, I have had trouble getting out of bed the past two mornings because when I wake up all I think is "Pats lost, Pats lost" and keep telling myself that it wasn't a bad dream. I know to normal people that seems crazy but it's my reality.

Like I imagine Tom Brady waking up in the middle of the night from a nightmare about Justin Tuck sacking him in the Third Quarter and Gisele comforting him back to sleep, and across the country in my bedroom I am waking up from a nightmare of me being witness to that sack and replaying it again and again in my dreams because I am so obsessed with it and how I feel like Tom Brady was not the same after that hit in the game and how that changed the outcome. Weird, I know, but this is the unhealthy obsession. Wicked pathetic

I would be drowning my sorrows in Dunkin Donuts Iced Coffee BUT I CAN'T EVEN DO THAT BECAUSE THERE ARE NO DUNKS IN CALIFORNIA! AHHHHHHHH!!!!

And I want to give a shout out to the guy over at Barstoolsports.com who writes for the Boston part of that site. He does a great job expressing the emotional attachment and wreckage we go through as Die Hahhhd fans. If you're from Boston and never read that website, what is wrong with you! Go check it out, click on Boston when ya get there though, so you read our cities bloggings and postings. Wicked good stuff. And helpful through these tough times.

I know, you're probably saying enough already with your sobbing and crying.... But it feels like a bad break up, a break up that you really didnt want to have happen but you could almost see it coming.... And then you tell yourself that you can not call your ex, that you shouldnt even be thinking about her, but in all truth and reality, it consumes your mind.... Like as much as I tell myself "Lets go watch the Bruins", all I am thinking about it Brady trying to march down the field with less than a minute left and how I could feel my hopes being crushed deep in my man heart. And I know I am not a normal person when it comes to things likes sports.... when you are willing to name pets after players, decorate your house like it was a shrine to Fenway Park, Gillete Stadium, and the Garden (And doing this as a grown up adult man), and sacrifice relationships because the game was on - you're not normal, you're a Die Hard.

Ahhhhhhh man, this week sucks. I need to start a group like AA but for New England Sports fans, the fanatics. We need a meeting group where we can talk it out. Especially, the days following a big sports event like Sunday. Now more than ever, us fanatics need each other to not feel so crazy because honestly I thought I was being nuts until I read other guys blogs about how passionately they felt and how devestated they are in the days following. The group would have to have a cool name though, like Massholes Anonymous or something like that.... any ideas, hit me up.

I also really could of used this group after the Sox collapse last season, that was a difficult thing to live through and denial was part of my life for a while. Damn..... its been a rough few playoffs, the Bruins were great though, I am wearing my Bruins shirt today to try and cheer up.... I just love my Pats so much

I can hear the intervention music bed playing right now in the background, imagining my friends about to trick me into meeting them in some random hotel conference room to hold an intervention with me about how passionate about my teams I am. *Cue the music

Hi, my name is Rob and I'm a Boston-aholic.

Day afta the Super Bowl.....

The good Lord knows how bad my heart hurts right now. A crushing defeat at the hands of my arch-nemisis, makes you do some soul searching. My allegience to my Patriots will never faulter, but I will say this - that it makes you deal with loss, find ways to cope, and teach yourself how to deal with your emotions (because you get a sh** ton of them after such a defeat). I have a million emotions right now, disappointment has to be number one. Sad is up there too, but it all comes out as being pissed off. And will come out on any Giants fan I see. But thats the beauty of being a Masshole, we surpress our feelings and stuff them deep down inside to never be dealt with again.

So I'll say it, say the stuff that I think a lot of us New Englanders are thinking...... WHAT THE F***, now we gotta hear those pecker NYG fans talk about how great Eli Manning is for the next year and how this is another reason that (they think) Ny owns Boston is the sports world..... But let me remind you New Yorkers, Tom Brady still has one more ring than that idiot Manning. Also, I have nto seen the Rangers, Islanders, Knicks or Nets do anything of substance in the past 5 years. So piss off. 
Yeah, did you get us again, yes. Did you rip out our hearts and stomp on them like you did back in 2007 when the Giants destroyed our march to perfection, yes. But I am still proud to be a Patriots fan, a sad and heartbroken Patriots fan.

So now what do I do, drown myself in sorrow for a few days - YES. But then I guess we pick up the pieces of our shattered hearts and start watching the Celtics and Bruins again, cause I must admit, I've been knee deep in Pats coverage and unnecessary super bowl coverage for the past two weeks. I have watched a couple Celtics games but to be honest I was thinking about the Pats the whole time, that's weird..... Okay, so us New Englanders have somewhat of an unhealthy obsession with our sports teams, so much so that it can be affair-esque when you're in a relationship. But enough about that. We are talking about picking ourselves up after getting kicked in the d*ck repeatedly in what they call the Super Bowl.

I am WICKED FRIGGIN' UPSET. And this morning I was thinking, well if I feel this shotty I wonder how the players feel, but I can't feel bad for Tom Terrific because at least he gets to go home and motorboat that supahhh model Giselle to cheer himself up. I get to come home to two dogs and a couple of roommates who are also feeling just as miserable as I am. WTF.

It's still replaying in my head, driving me nuts.... I know nerves came in to play because the last time I seen that many dropped balls in the 4th quarter, it was while me and my roommates were playing touch football in the street.... I MEAN COME ON!

I feel like someone drove by me while I was walking on the side of the road and they drove through a big muddy puddle and soaked me. And now I am just standing here drenched in mud looking stupid. I feel like crap.

Yeah it hurts to loose the super bowl, brings me right back to 2007, but it also makes it 100 times worse that it was AGAIN to the Giants. Eitherway, there is no getting around this feeling of being kicked in the d*ck. C punch. Nut shot. It's pure devastation.

I love my Patriots so much, so much it hurts, hurts bad too. It's weird how affected I am. But I look at some of the team members as members of my own family, I feel like I have been there through the good times and the bad for them, rooting through it all..... and when something like this happens, I feel it as a fan as I suffered the loss with them. Now I get that some people who arent diehards witht heir sports teams dont get that, and if thats you, I can never explain this feeling to you. But for those of you who bleed your teams colors, you get me. This will take a few days to shake off.

I will say this, I am really happy that Thor got to watch the game with his dad. But that's it. I know what a special occassion this is so for Thor to be able to be at home and spend this time with his family is one of the greatest feelings in the world. I missed out on being able to do this because I was trying to make it in my career and jsut did not have the money to travel across the country.... but these memories will be lifelong ones and that is a moment that sometimes only happens once in a lifetime.

12 Days, 18 Hours, and a few minutes from right now until Pitchers and Catchers report to Spring Training..... GO SOX

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