The only way I can somewhat kinda sort of maybe relate to the way I've been feeling is.... if you've ever been knocked out before. And I'm talking seeing colors, knocked out, saw black, come to, seeing the color spots, and then getting your grip of what just happened...... and come to realize, damn I think I was knocked out for a minute. No, I know I just got knocked out. Standing on my feet, knocked the F*** out.
And the only reason I know that sensation and awakening/realization is from when I took boxing. I loved boxing, not getting my bell rang but loved sparring, just being in the ring, toe to toe, every punch thrown was therapuetic.
Surreal. Great word, better definition. It helps to exactly define what my sensation has been walking around day to day. Surreal.
Like reality has left me, leaving to grip and cling onto the last desperate clutches of what I used to know, my reality has changed and it hasn't been kind enough to let me catch up, get my bearings, or prepare. But that's life. You will never be prepared for tragic events. I guess adaptability is a virtue, somewhat like patience.
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